Light and shadows

Recently, there has been a growing trend of men stepping up and owning their actions, demonstrating a readiness to reflect on whether they have overstepped boundaries in their interactions with others and even acknowledging when they have.

Additionally, a more significant number of men are demonstrating an eagerness to educate themselves about and engage in conversations about gender dynamics and the prevalence of violence in our society.

Witnessing this progress is fascinating as it requires much bravery to introspect and confront one's vulnerabilities and potential errors. I've been engaging in this process for months and years, so I understand the level of commitment it demands.

I haven't committed any heinous acts. I have never mistreated anyone, but I acknowledge that my actions may have caused harm to others, whether intentionally or unintentionally. Additionally, there are minor things I've done that I regret or wish I could undo.

It wasn't until I had improved my self-esteem that I could confront these characteristics within myself and the aspects that have always caused me shame. Previously, I lacked confidence and tended to be overly self-critical, so I would have used my weaknesses and past mistakes to undermine myself further.

Had I attempted to scrutinize myself so candidly back then, it would have exacerbated my already negative feelings. I might have interpreted those situations as justification for self-deprecation.

Realizing my value allowed me to acknowledge my humanity for the first time. I could finally accept that I am not flawless, am prone to errors, and may be mistaken at times. This newfound awareness enables me to assess my actions, especially in challenging relationships.

When I began to assess parts of my life that didn't bring me joy or satisfaction, as well as events or behaviours that made me feel ashamed, I understood that these traits and actions were not inherently bad. They were aspects that I had criticized within myself, actions for which I had condemned myself, and things that I considered lacking.

Recognizing one's strengths and weaknesses is a positive and healthy practice. Through self-reflection, I have been able to forgive myself for past actions, take ownership of my behaviour, and accept the aspects of myself that I once criticized.

This is part of the process of being on a spiritual path: starting by learning to cherish yourself and realize all the positive things that you have to offer in order to later be able to see the qualities in your behaviour that you prefer not to recognize and deny in yourself. After that, one is left with a whole person who possesses both advantages and disadvantages—the person you really are.